Caitlin's first words

Writing on a journal kept me sane and calm when mood swing hits due to the hormonal imbalance brought by my pregnancy. And when I gave birth, it helped me battle the post-partum blues. Now, I continue to write for a different purpose. I keep tabs on the little and big things that I do with Caitlin then I write them down.

So while I was reading my diary again, I chanced upon my entry on Caitlin’s first words.

Nov. 1

"Ay, dada."

We heard it, but I guess our ears were just playing on us. So my husband said, "Ok, let's not count that as her first word." I easily gave in, of course.

But after a few days, we heart it again: “dada.” No, it couldn't be. I spend more time with Caitlin than her dada does. Why should dada be her first word?

Then it came in quick successions today at six and a half months old: "Dada." She'll look at me and say, "dada," while on my lap or while I carry her she'll say, "Dadadadadada" out of nowhere that I can't pretend "dada" isn't her first word over "mama" any longer.

Nov. 11

8:30 pm

So ganun pala ang feeling. Ang saya kapag una mong narinig sa anak mo ang katagang "mama." Kahit na umiiyak siya habang sinasabi niya ito, ok lang. Lalo ko pang ipinaramdam na gustong-gusto ko siyang kargahin - kahit ilang oras pa! Marinig ko lang na tawagin niya ako, maiibsan na ang pagod ko. Dati pa man, alam kong ako na talaga ang gusto niya at hinahanap sa gabi. Pero ngayon lang niya ako tinawag ng “mama.”

Nauna na niyang sinabi ang "dada,” "daddy," at "ate" bago ang "mama." Kapag sinasabi  niya ang dada, kung hindi man siya nakatingin sa daddy niya, pinagmamasdan niya ang pintuan na tila ba inaabangan ang pag-uwi ng kanyang ama. Noong una niyang sinabi ang “ate,” sakto namang pinagmamasdan naming nagluluto ng hapunan ang kasama namin sa bahay. At sa kanya nakatingin si Caitlin. Kaya noong nag-iiiyak na siya, gustong magpakarga, at habang karga ko ay ilang ulit na sinabi ang” mama,” alam kong kilalala na niya ako. Ganun pala ang pakiramdam, ang sabi ko sa daddy niya. Ang saya at hindi mawala-wala ang ngiti ko.

- Mommy Smiley